Healthy Living

Improve Your Romance in Your Marriage

No matter what status your relationship is in, this is one area that can always be improved upon. Leading a happy healthy marriage transcends to other areas of your life.  Romantic CoupleLove is a wonderfully simple concept, but it is never easy.  Love and romance work together, hand in hand.  Romance is when you show your spouse in your own special way how much you love her without ulterior motives.  You introduce romance between you and your partner to show that there is love in your relationship.  Romance and love is about selfless giving for the pure joy of making your marriage a happy union.

Love can never be expected to be perfect.  Although some people might come close to perfect love, it is impossible to achieve.   Imagine how boring a perfect love would be!  Keep in mind that love is never about perfection and it should only be about love.  Romance isn’t without its imperfections either. What works for one person may not work for another.  Romance should simply be about love and it is important to remember that.

When you approach romance, you can’t approach it as if it is a science or some task that can be controlled or predicted.  Romance is an art form that should be expressed as creatively as possible.  When you enter into a relationship and intend to make romance a strong part of that relationship, you need to make sure that you have an open mind, a creative nature or that you have access to excellent resources that allow you to borrow from other people’s creative genius.  When they say “it’s the little things that count” it really is. The emotional connection is key. Place a note in his/her lunch or car, bring home some fresh flowers, buy them their favorite treat. While us woman do love the expensive things, it really is the little things that matter most.

Love is something two people have to work at together.  You need to be able to set any competitive nature aside and truly enjoy what your are able to give as well as what you receive.  If you are always trying to outdo what your spouse has done or even what you have previously done as far as romantic attempts, you will eventually become frustrated and fall flat on your face.  That’s not very romantic.

If you can get away from it all. Try taking a mini vacation to try to reconnect. My husband and myself are planning a trip next month and I hope to do just that. We are leaving our son with Grandma and taking off for 3 days. I hope that we can reconnect and enjoy each other’s company like we once did. Marriage makes us comfortable, too comfortable, and we lose our connection to each other. If you marriage isn’t loving or compassionate, that isn’t healthy. Your children deserve two happy parents. They see more than you think.

So take some time and think, really think about what you can do today to improve your relationship. It could be something simple or something more complex but anything is better than letting another day go by without doing anything. You both deserve to be happy and live a healthy love life and your children will not only benefit from being happier but they will see what kind of example you are setting for happy healthy marriage.

Need more ideas and help?

 Michele Weiner-Davis, MSW is an internationally renowned relationship expert, best-selling author, marriage therapist, and professional speaker who specializes in helping people change their lives and improve important relationships. Listed below are some of her most popular books. I have read her work and it really is an eye opener.  Her website,, Divorce Busting, has tons of great information as well and an online community. You can also follow her on twitter.

Karla Urwitz
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